CATCOUK is going on a diet

Hello all. I think we can all agree that I simply don't have time to sit down for an hour on a Sunday evening, and write a load of dribble to entertain the masses. But instead of calling it a night, and in an attempt to provide you with the 'entertainment' that you want, this blog is going bitesize!

'What does this mean?' I hear both of you ask. Well, I will try and write some very short posts every day, so that if you want to continue reading weekly, you can. And there should be a couple of amusing things waiting there for you. But this new style also means that you can drop in daily, and pick your daily dribble. So, like a talented MP, I have made something crap, sound very appealing.

Sorry if you don't like the plan, but it's that or nothing.

And I can't write a post without a quick tale from my world. As many of you will know, in February I was promoted at NTC to a Commander, and made the organisation's Adventure Activities Director. As such, I have to attend many boring meetings. For example, I have just been told that I have to attend Chief of Staff meetings. I didn't even know that those kind of meetings existed! And I'll probably just sit through those meetings being very bored, and listening to old people argue with each other.

But the recent National Council meeting I attended was better entertainment that watching EastEnders. Alright, so every National Council meeting can beat crappy ol' EastEnders, but this one was on a par with Top Gear. One guy was making his report, when he said 'I have been recieving letter upon letter upon letter from a bloke in Fareham saying that he wants to open an (NTC) Unit. [Regional Commader for the area's name] - what is going on?'

'Well,' replied the regional commander, 'I know the gentleman in question, and I wouldn't recommend him as a CO.' At this point I have to say that unless he's a kiddy-fiddler (and I hope he isn't) he can't be worse than the current CO there - there isn't one! But that's besides the point. It's not like the NTC needs to open more units or it will die...

'Just one minute sir!' replied the boss in a raised heated voice. I use the term boss, as there are at least three people that fit that category, so I leave it to you to guess who. I want to protect his or her identity for a change. 'There is nothing wrong with him. I know him too, and I think it's more a case that you just don't want to open a new unit.' Arguments happen quite alot, but everyone was watching intently. But little did we know that the best was yet to come...

The aggrieved boss continued 'He's not scruffy, although I am sure he let's him self go from time to time.' Okay, still nothing that entertaining, but here it comes. Remembering that he's the boss - 'As he's a relative of mine, I know him very well.'

Oh dear me, the look on everyone's faces was a picture. The guy who started the report went fish-faced, I was struggling not to laugh, and the regional commander look like he had shrunk by 3ft, probably because he was sweating so much, and looking so red. Absolute classic. Understandably, no one said a word, as the two continued to argue the point. This was just too entertaining. Eventually, the regional commander was practically ordered to have an interview with the new guy. Fantastic.

Well that's it for now. Don't forget, with a bit of luck, I'll have a short one for you tomorrow (and yes, I do tell all the girls that...).