Only joking!

It's a good job you don't pay to read this. This week is certainly worthy of a refund, as yet again, I have had another slow and boring week. So, if you'll take a heavy dose of caffeine, and try and stay awake, I shall begin... (oh boy)

The week started with my monthly night off. Last month I went to climbing club at University, and then spent some time up the bar (with free drinks for driving). This month, being the terribly exciting person that I am, I spent my evening... working at the Adult Education office. For free. Unlike Sainsbury's, I enjoy working there, and to be perfectly honest, I had nothing better to do. How interesting am I?

As if things weren't bad enough, this week's main story comes from the dark grizzely depths that are... (intake of breath)

SAINSBURY'S (typed with dramatic thunderclap in background for a bit of dramatic effect. If you didn't imagine a thunderclap when you read that, please go back and read it again...)

After enduring an excrutiating four hours (that seemed more like 8) on Wednesday night, I returned for an encore on Thursday evening. Oh I just love working there... But what really gets my goat about working at Sainsbury's is that when people put in the effort, nobody cares. Now I'm not talking about my effort. Hell no. I learned along time ago that putting in any effort at Sainsbury's is a waste of time. You can do a half-assed job and still get the same praise.

No, I am talking about a friend of mine. A trolley-wally with a difference. He looks like a normal average idiot, but he's actually very bright and witty. For some weeks he has been off work with a bad leg, but he has made that extra effort, and despite still having a very dodgy knee was out Thursday night pushing trolleys around. I admire the committment to truely awful managers. He was struggling a bit, so my supervisor asked me to go out and help him. That evening, I spent an hour-and-a-half outside helping him.

When I went back inside, the supervisor had the cheek to complain about him. Wished that he would go home, and just take sick leave, claiming it would be more efficient. I thought about that, and actually, by being at work, Gerry at had cut the costs to the company by two-thirds (costing just £7.80 instead of £22.20). Of course I felt the need to make my point to the mall minded supervisor.

On a similar line, that same small minded supervisor then asked me to do overtime during Easter. For the exact reason above (no-one appreciating any effort) I never do overtime. I refuse to help them out over and above my contract. So you can understand why I just continued to laugh when the supervisor tried to persuade me to do overtime to 'help the company', 'to help the team', because she knew how much I wanted to be a 'team member'. What a load of old clap-trap. Because of this, I have started a new section at the bottom of the blog. The weekly excuse for not doing overtime.

To finish that night of incompetence off at Sainsbury's, the very same supervisor then pointed to some carrier bags of food, and asked me to take them out and throw them away. So, she's the boss, and I did. I then went back to the checkouts, and another member of staff asked if I had seen a couple of carrier bags. I replied with a quizzical look on my face: 'What, the tw carrier bags I just threw in the skip?'

This is where we get to explaining this week's title. When I confronted my supervisor about the poor lady's shopping that I had to recover from the skip, Wendy replied: 'Oh you didn't! I was only joking!' Yeah right. What an idiot.

Well that's it. Another eye-gougingly boring week out the way. Please give me something to write about this week. But not bad stuff (be careful what you wish for...).

If you think that my blog is getting worse and worse, and that you could do a better job, why not leave a comment starting with the word 'moron'.

If you think that it is the effort that counts, why not (after throwing away any applications forms for Sainsbury's) leave a message starting with the word 'antidisestablishmentarianism'.

Quote of the Week: 'In Wales, they say the sun is like a fox. I can't remember why though,' said Tabs quizzically in the deceptivly cold sunshine on Monday.

TV Quote of the Week: 'I can handle you driving like a p*ss-head, and treating women like bean bags. But I'm going to say this only once: STAY OUT OF CAMBERWICK GREEN!' DI Sam Tyler, Life On Mars. BBC1, Tuesdays at 9pm (repeated this Tuesday at 10pm on BBC3).

Reason-for-not-doing-overtime of the week: 'I try to stay away from overtime - it gives me a rash!'