Firstly, I must apologise. This weeks blog rates no Escorts out of five, it's the Sunday Sport of posts, it is as lame as the Grand National winner 1937 (although I'd expect that horse is actually dead). To sum up, this week's blog is crap. Sorry, but this week has been a bit of a slow news week. Let's hope for better material next week.
As I've already explained, just about bugger all intersting has happenned this week. Ha ha ha - I went to work, what a blast! Because our lucky lecturers went away with the Foundation Degree students on a residential, we've had zip, zero, nuddah lectures (well after Tuesday's environmental rubbish). So as I'm sure you can imagine, I'm clutching at straws with this week's post.
For my first straw clutching attempt, I'll explain this week's title. I bought my DVD player in January 2004, and it works absolutly fine. But as with all things, there came a time when I had to buy my first box set. Being a bit of a trekkie (well more than a bit, but I don't have any pointed ears), I decided my first box set would have to be the original Star Trek series. Christmas 2004, and then the January sales 2005, I managed to get the box set, and The Proffesionals!
Right from the word go, my DVD has always had a problem with Star Trek DVDs. Whenever I put "The Proffesionals" in, or "Starsky & Hutch" or anything that's not Star Trek, the player's fine. But, if I try to put a Star Trek DVD in, my DVD player tries to cut my hand off! The tray will open, I'll go to put the DVD in, and the tray will close. It's not like it opens and closes straight away everytime, sometimes I try and catch it out (hover over the open DVD tray for a while). Just when I think it's safe, I try to put the DVD in, and WHIRRR - the tray slides in again!
Told you I was clutching at straws!
Second load of straws I'm clutching at this week is a psychic pregnancy test. No, I'm not pregnant (saucy git), and niether have I got a friend pregnant (even saucier git). Whilst at work, we ran out of customers, and I was banished to... [shudder] SHELF STACKING!!!!!!!
As horrendous as this all sounds, I didn't have to actually stack the shelves, I just had to do what's known as 'facing-up' (bring all the products to the front, facing the same way). I was sent to the Health & Beauty department (was my supervisor trying to tell me something?), and had to 'face-up' items from toothpaste, to medicines, and from condoms to pregnancy tests. Whilst facing up, I found this one test that claimed it could tell if you were pregnant 4 days early!
No I'm not a women, and I'm sure that has a very serious, completely understandable meaning, but to my mind, that implies it can tell you are pregnant 4 days before conception? How does it know this? You're going to get lucky in 4 nights time, and you'll have forgotten protection! If you know how it works, please tell me.
Lastly, I must inform you that Robbie Williams and Angels is spreading! I regret to tell you that I was joined on stage recently at an NTC disco (who are the NTC? Click Here!). Scott, Graham, and Ian (Abdulha to his friends) all participated in forcing my on stage for the grand finale to Saturday night's Disco. What a mistake that was. Although I'm sure we were all in perfect tune, we weren't exactly in tune with each other... Well it was a good floor clearer anyway!
Thanks for putting up with this rubbish, let's hope for something better next week! Even though it was all rubbish, and went no where, this week's post was still mind-numbingly long. As long as it was boring! Excellent...
If you think this was up to my usual 'standard', and I'm usually rubbish, why not leave a comment telling me to stop boring you to death.
If you appreciated this little view of my world, why not leave a comment, and tell me that you;d pay money to read this (please leave your credit card details).
If you are a women, and understand what that pregnancy test meant, why not leave a comment, saying what a stupid bloke I am, and give all us ignorant guys a full explanation. No really.
Lastly, you can check my Bebo out now. Thanks. catcouk.bebo.com
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3 comments:
I would like to point out that it was Robbie Williams that was out of tune, not any of us, especially me, cos I rock.
international talk like a pirate day on the 19th, so...
arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
Pirate Abdulla
Hi Andy,
As for the pregnancy test (and no i havent used 1 before you ask) the 1 yoiu mentioned can recognise pregnancy hormones four days before any other test. It basically works by testing for a smaller amount of said hormone in your body.
I would like to re-iterate Nicola's comment that she hasn't used one before.
Think I'd be in some serious trouble if she did......
Non-Pirate Abdulla
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