Week Five: I can't think of any more titles that begin Welcome Back

Hello to one and all. First off the bat, I need to straighten a few things out. I'm not very good at making sure that my comments get answers when they ask something. So I'm going to do that first. Either I used the term 'CIT' or one of my comments did. The term CIT refers to a 14 year-old staff member, that is a 'Councellor In Training'. Sorted.

I also feel a strong urge to point out that having more clocks in camp is a rediculous idea, and Nick is still a bit bizarre. No matter how many comments you leave Nick, it will not chnage the fact that people could just buy a watch, instead of demanding more clocks around camp. Just keep looking for toads in the breezeway...

So, this week has seen me clawing back at my department's seasonal average. Last year, despite having a capacity of 6 Scouts, the sailing department ended the year with an average of 7.2 Scouts per week. Last week we only had 2 Scouts, and I need to start getting that average up again (for the pride and fine tradition of the Corpulent Porpoise). So this week, we took 8 Scouts through their Small Boat Sailing Merit Badge. If I can get another 8 through this week, I'm back up to an average of 6 a week!

The rest of this week, just like the rest if camp so far, has gone swimmingly well. A few complaints, but nothing too serious or repetitive. Alas, we realised this week that there is trouble on the horizon. Just like last year, when I was doing site assignments, Asst. Camp Director Nick found that we have more campers coming in a few weeks than we have beds for. Oh dear... Fortunatly we have a plan, and once again, the camp will be very crowded, but program will continue. Unfortunatly, the plan involves moving staff members from their accomodation. It's a logical plan, I just wish the camp would tell the staff members involved...

But the week hasn't all been great ice cream whilst sailing, followed by stress and frustration. I did infact have some fun with my friends at the Health Lodge, Bridget and Pat. One evening, I was in the dining hall, when a Scout walked in, not wearing anything but a towel. The camp has a dress code for the dining hall, and oddly enough, more than a towel is required. So, myself and other staff members challenged the Scout. He said that he needed to use the toilet, as he had diaheorra. Obviously we let him in.

As fellow commissioner Nick phoned into the Health Lodge, annoncing 'Code Brown', we waited for the Scout to come out so we could escort him to the Health Lodge. The Scout came out looking very healthy, and it was then that I started to piece the evidence together. As the Scout was getting changed in his tent, it dawned on me. Young looking Scout (most likely first year), and it's Tuesday. Well, most first year Scouts don't like the idea of using the latrines (where you do you business into a fancy looking, but fowl smelling hole in the ground). By Tuesday, it becomes time for nature to take it's course. The kid didn't have the runs, he just hadn't been in several days!

As the Scout casually hung his swimming shorts out to dry, I said that he should bring them with him, as we escorted him to Health Lodge. Making him carry them at arms length the entire way, we walked into the Health Lodge with him. At this point, the nurse, Bridget took one look at us, and started screaming at us. 'You made him carry those all the way accross camp?!?!?!' If they were really dirty, you don't really want to be spreading contaminant. As Nick and I tried to bolt, Bridget chased after us angrily. I explained the situation, and she started laughing.

In the meantime, Pat has placed the shorts in a plastic bag, and has now come tearing out of the Health Lodge, proceeding to hit Nick and I. Eventually, we stop laughing long enough to explain the situation. I hope that taught the Scout a lesson about using latrines, and lying - A Scout is Honest!

Finally, I discovered this weekend that I can get 15% discount at the local outdoor equipment store. They give this discount to students, and they accepted my UK National Union of Students card. Good news. Last weekend, my long lasting €35 'walking shoes' from France gave up. The soles started to peel off, and the apoxy resin is only just holding. Having said that, I only bought the things because I forgot my boots when I went on a three day expedition in Fontainbleu in 2006. They were cheap, and have lasted rediculously well. So, I need new shoes for Uni is September, may as well get them now. As it turns out, it was damn cheap. $60 (roughly £30) saw me get new Merrell approach shoes. The cheapest I've seen them back home is £45-£50. The climbing gear here is cheap as well. It looks like I'll need to find some luggage room.

Well that's been my week in the US. On a couple of a personal notes: Siobhan, that looked both disgusting and painful; Michael, best of luck, and I need to speak to you soon.

If you like to play practical 'code brown' jokes on people, you might want to leave a comment asking for profesional help.

If you don't enjoy playing practical 'code brown' jokes on people, you may wish to leave a comment telling us how sick we all are!

Quote of the Week: 'I don't want any witnesses!' said Bill (the boss) menacingly, as Program Director Joe, Commssioner 'Girly Scream' Nick, and I discussed how we would remove some brown bats.